I'm a fuckin stupid girl. What a let down. At least I know my place now. And the truth eventually hurts when you think back.
Delivered at 9:31 AM;
Saturday, April 22, 2006
Damn it la.. what the hell! I never expected things to turn out this bad. Ever since year 3 started, there's the issue of fyp grouping. Like suddenly I'm in a different place. Things I never knew existed, I got to know about them. And I thought everything's a fair game. And I thought the competition in poly though it's quite tough in my course, is just not as bad as those in JCs where you suddenly see the backstabbing and all in the 2nd year. I guess this is it? Final year and all the true colours show up. I'm just totally pissed off about this...
responsibilities. cant run away from it. but right now i juz wish i can let all them go.
Sunday, April 09, 2006
I've found out what I needed to know. There can't be more lies can it? I don't know why but it hurts a little. That pang of jealousy, it caught me by surprise. But all the more it gives me a reason not to look back, no matter how sweet the memories were. Afterall, sweeter memories can be created with someone new. And he's been sweet enough. Ydae he was so thoughtful in his actions that I juz couldn't help smiling at him all d way, knowing he keeps me in his heart and mind with his every action.
There's much to be said. Mak Long has returned to Allah. She'd been through a short but painful journey fighting leukemia. After 7 months of suffering from acute lymphocytic leukemia, she returned to the world of eternity. The 2nd last time I visited her in hospital, it pained me so much just to look at her and the last time I visited her in hospital, she was already in coma. I left for a while cuz I had been there since morning, only to find out about an hour later after I left, she has left the world. It's a great loss to everybody.
4 more days to go to end of ITP. So far, it's been quite an enriching experience. Exposure to the kind of life I'll be living, and also how bad the politics can be in working life. Looking forward to start of school? I'm not really sure cuz I've taken a look at my new timetable and it's so hectic, I can only work 2 days a week... but I sure do miss my friends.... Can't wait to see them again.
Work at CL's been okay. Getting more comfortable being in the service floor already. My knowledge about wine is gradually increasing but it's still very minimal and I don't really have full confidence in serving wine yet. I kinda love doing bar and bar closing, with the exception of making cocktails.
Currently everything's going smoothly.. and I hope it remains that way.. :)
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Dear Diary,
I've come to update you again. Yesterday was my last day at CP dept. Fortunately for me, I get to see interesting stuffs yesterday. It was the first time I saw a cornea, and the first time I held a bag of large intestine. The samples came from the window via hand, and I was checking thru d list. Was holding that bag of large intestine and then it suddenly hit me... What the hell was I holding? My first thought was that I was holding a brain. I mean with the grooves and blood.. I thought it was a brain.. but no, it was a large intestine.
Work at CL was sickening last night. Something happened which got me so pissed. I know I'm still not very knowledgable in this type of service and I don't mind if they sometimes question my capabilities. I know nuts about wines and alcoholic beverages but I sure do know how to fire food when I'm told to. I don't mind if I were to be scolded for something wrong that I did. But to be mocked and blamed as if I couldn't perform a single At least it was justified. I had planned to work till finish but I requested to go home early cuz I bet the longer I were to stay, things might fly and glasses might break. I was downright angry that tears of anger were flowing. Yeah... so after I left the workplace I went straight to Aman's workplace. I just knew he would make things right. Like I told you he has his ways of bringing the smile back to my face... and so he did! In less than 2 hours I was back to a happy mood.
Anyway dear Diary, I'm going to play a make up artist today! Gonna doll my cousin up for her D&D. Haha.. 3 years back it was her dolling me up..now it's meee turn.. kekee.. I'm so excited.... okay dear diary.. I'm gonna stop here. WIll update you more alriteyy dear diaryy...
Signing off,
Nurul.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Dear Diary,
I have been abandoning you for too long haven't I? Fear not dear Diary, cuz I'm updating you again.
Well dear Diary, it's two weeks into my attachment at TTSH.
I was attached to the blood banking department for the first week. It's been an enriching experience. Well, I didn't get to do much in that department compared to back when I was attached to Doc's Lab. However, they really do teach me a lot and they let me do practicals on tested specimens and they'll supervise me when I'm doing tests on new specimens. Fine enough I guess. At least I learnt a lot there in a week. Satisfying enough. Btw the Blood Banking dept is an all-girls dept, and they are all very sweet. I like!
This week, I'm attached to the Central Processing department. It's pretty simple actually. Not that much to learn compared to Blood Banking. Wallis, the person who was in charge of the attachment students for the CP dept, even finished teaching me in two days. Reason because he's on leave for two days this week and so he tried to finish teaching what he's supposed to cover for me. Sucha responsible guy.. hmm.. I like! haha.. So yeah, I'm getting quite bored with the things that I'm doing there but hey! I'm fitting in very well with the people there. Uncle Rodrigues is one person worth mentioning. He's one person who'll make you smile. Dear Diary, Uncle Rod has been working in TTSH for bout 40 years and he has lots of stories to share and so I took the opportunity to know stuffs bout working in the hospital. Tomorrow's my last day in CP and then I'm moving on to Haematology dept.
Anyway dear Diary, that's it about attachment so far. I'm gonna talk about my pt job now. So far things are okay lah. They rarely put me as runner anymore. Now I'm on the service floor more often. Dear Diary, I've learnt how to open a wine bottle already but I've yet to try opening them in front of guests.
Dear Diary, yesterday, the restaurant was full house. No walk-ins. No reservations. We had three functions going on.
1 room for 21 pax. another room for 44 pax. and another room for.. I'm not quite sure actually. Well that's not the point. The point was that I was assigned to taking care of the function with 44 pax and specifically, I was in charge of the juices. But at the end of the day, there were some misunderstanding between the guest and my manager and they refused to pay for the juices cuz they did not believe that they had that $800 worth of juices (5 jars). THey thought my manager just came up iwth the figure 5 and overcharged him for hte juices. But I somehow I just felt guilty, that I had not delivered my task well and so, I broke down. I was trying hard not to break down in front of my colleagues bt I couldn't stop the tears and I guess some of them saw it. I was so glad that Man offered to meet me last night cuz he said he missed me. And so dear diary, I just cried my heart out on his shoulders. And he has his ways of bringing back the smile to my face so I went home a happier girl after all last night, despite what happened.
Well, that's all that I have to say now dear Diary. Will update you again when I'm free. Love you dear Diary....
Signing off,
a bored Nurul.
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Retribution works in a funny funny way. I guess what goes around really does come around.
I've always believed there's a reason on why you meet certain people. I've always believed that the people you meet, get to know, will serve a purpose in your life, one way or another. Whether the person's gonna make a major impact in your life, or minor, is for you to find out as time goes by.
There shouldn't have been any reason that I met him. We were once total strangers, and linked, by one distant person. The chances of us meeting were like as close as zero. And the fact that be bored me to death further decreases the chances of us getting together. But the Almighty has His ways. With a twist of situations, things were turned around, and we were brought together. For retribution.
Saturday, February 25, 2006
2 down, 1 more to go.
I can't fucking wait.
And I fucking need a fucking holiday.
I feel so fucking dying to get out of here.
Staying in the country trapped with a fucking way of life has made me so fucking crazy I need to fucking get outta here.
Fucking help me out, wont ya?
[x] quiet, but a thinker [x]
[o] express herself in text form [o]
[x] emotional [x]
[o] soft at heart, but headstrong [o]
[x] mood-swing prone [x]
[o] hearts the girlfrieends [o]
[x] simple girl [x]
[o] simple life [o]
[x] but not exactly a simple mind [x]
